Pounded In The Backside By A Jewel Bug
How are you supposed to cope with all your inner ugliness and jealousy. Question mark.
First of all, make sure that you are jealous and not just full of general rage. Before you decide to be jealous of another lad’s lot, be sure that he or she possesses something that you would actually like to be yours. Think about having the thing that you covet. Now see in your mind’s half-tear, half-fear, half-hope-filled eyes, a movie about yourself getting it - please God without pounding them unexpectedly in the backside and then robbing their unconscious corpse.
Think about the things you might need to do in order to get the thing they have. Think about your big fat dreams. Think about who you are. Think about what you do. Think about your luckiness quotient. Think about your determination. Think about having your will interrogated and badgered and pounded in the backside by rejection. Think about looking at it (Rejection I mean, insectified as a bejeweled jewel bug…and you, personified as a person, for a minute) feeling like a fraudulent and see-through fool…and saying…saying…saying strongly – “NO…I AM THE RIGHT LAD. I AM A LAD WORTH LISTENING TO. I AM A TRYER AND A TRY AGAINER. I MAY BE THE ONE AND ONLY ADVOCATE FOR MY OWN BRILLIANCE JUST NOW BECAUSE I HAVE YET TO FIND MY TEAM. BUT I WILL SEARCH AND SEARCH AND ON AND ON UNTIL I DO, through deep space, or what feels like it, forever. And I’ll try to remain noble on the way, but lookit, I’m a man. A mere ignoble man. Someday death will surely stop me for a spell. But if you, mere other man or men, bring only words...bring only your opinions, beliefs, biases and outright tricks, you cannot, cannot, cannot break me down. I will try and try until I die. And even then, if there’s a place for triers, I will maintain. My will I will maintain.”
And knowing this, and knowing that you will continue to try like such a stubborn and an oft times pesky buzzard, however unsuc or successful you may be. Begin.